Tuesday, April 13, 2010
QUANTUM GRAVITY and the BATTERY DUDE, a Super-Short Story
My first, probably-pathetic, and possibly last attempt to add yet another science-fiction story to the Human Race, inspired by discussion with Sabine "Bee" Hossenfelder, here.
QUANTUM GRAVITY and the BATTERY DUDE
Once upon a time there was a little dude who lived in a civilization inside a car battery. He was brilliant, but had no idea that there were two posts on the outside of the battery, an anode and a cathode.
So he surmised that power must come from somewhere, and so he then incorrectly surmised a single "ode" he called a "superode".
It simply must be, he said. Two "odes" would unnecessarily complicate my sulfuric acid universe.
One day he dreamed a dream and connected with his also-dreaming "god," the owner of the car in which he resided, and asked him if his theory was right.
"No," said the owner. "There's two battery posts, an anode and a cathode. They operate somewhat differently, but they exist in your universe at the same time."
"Or toughski shitski as they say in Poland."
"What's a Poland?"
"Nevermind. So, what are you going to do now? Abandon your theory and work on the correct one?"
"Hmm? Why not?"
"Because, I don't believe you or anything else I can't see. I'm a Positivist! Anyways, the politicians who fund me don't know anything about Science, and they know nothing about this conversation. I'm going to request even MORE money for Superode Theory!"
"Hmm, well you could be open-minded like Lee Smolin in our Universe and request funding for all possibilities."
"Yeah, maybe. I'll think about it."
"Or you could ask the Engineers."
"What? The friggin' gearheads?! What do they know?"
"Limits and constraints?"